Two Silly Girls, Mr. Bean and Bathroom Humour

I sadly spilled coffee on myself this morning and since all my other pants were in the wash already, I had to walk the kids to school with a freezing thigh in the frosty weather.

But I was reminded of another story...

One of my dearest friends was a fellow student in University.  We met on the first day of intro-week, and while other students ran wild through the dormitories, drunk and body-painted, we found ourselves hiding on my dorm room floor, each confessing we were terrified.  We (figuratively) held on to each other and almost 20 years later have never let go.

So when we were able to get away together to the big city of Toronto, we jumped at the chance.  There was a baking and sweets show, and since we both loved baking and sweets, we booked a hotel and our tickets.

While at the show, other than eating and snapping pictures of incredible cakes, we attended one small lesson on cake decorating.  Like the English classes we giggled and snorted our way through in university, this class was to be the same.

The workshop was led by professional pastry chef, Jorg Amsler, who, a surprise to us, was Swiss.  My friend, a proud immigrant from Switzerland, cheered and pumped her arms in the air, giving her nationality away. During a short Swiss German conversation with Chef Amsler, my friend was in her element.

I leaned in to whisper, "All I know how to say is 'ich mues uf s'WC'," which means 'I have to go to the bathroom', and we snorted and giggled just like we were nineteen again.  Jorg continued the class in English.

As I scribbled down what he was saying, my friend started looking through her large bag.  There was a lot of huffing and sighing going on as she pulled out wet papers, soggy tissues and a slightly opened bottle of water.

The bottle had leaked throughout everything in her bag.  I groaned. She groaned.

And then, as she proceeded to lift her carpet bag, we discovered her entire lap was soaking wet from her waist down to her knees.  "Oh no," she moaned, and then burst out laughing. We giggled and snorted again, trying to get ahold of ourselves as not to insult the Swiss Chef.

"So much for taking your photo with him!" I laughed. It looked as if she'd peed her pants.

Luckily we were planning to go back to the hotel afterward anyway, so we got in the car to head out, but not before she went into the bathroom, and pulled a Mr. Bean. (well, at least part of it :) )

There were loads of other things that happened.  I lost my camera (in the bathroom) on the first day.  We were too loud in the restaurant and people nearby got up and left.  She spilled a whole coffee into my car seat and I had to sit on a plastic bag.  And that was just the first day.

When we got to the hotel, we asked the concierge for some paper towels to help clean up the spilled coffee.

"Oh, yes. Of course we have them. Just hold on," and he disappeared around the corner and never came back.

Two more times throughout the weekend we stopped in at the front desk and asked the same man for paper towels.  And each time he'd say, "Oh, yes. Of course we have them. Just hold on," and he'd disappear around the corner and never come back.

So at the end of the weekend, my friend dashed into the bathroom and stole the box of kleenex, mumbling something about paper towels and the crazy concierge.

But despite blotting the seat with kleenex, I still had to ride home sitting on a plastic bag.  But I wasn't the one with the wet bum.

My dear friend had not packed any other pants.